Thierry Boudan Photography Resource / Articles
Baby Routines
Top Tips to Establishing a Routine
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I decided to introduce the topic for discussion at The Matilda Mum and Baby group. All the mothers attending, and those I spoke to later in the Baby Clinic, said that they were aiming towards getting their baby into a routine. The majority already believed that they had achieved some kind of routine, though some said that this was only at night-times and that they were still struggling with unsettled babies during the day. (The age range was from 3 weeks to 5 months). Almost all had read Gina Ford’s book and a surprising number, to me, said that they found it to be effective in helping them settle their baby into a routine. One mother of 3 under 5 year olds told me that she could not have survived without using Ford’s methods and that all three children slept each day between 12 and 2 and were all in bed by 7 each night. I must confess she looked wonderful and the baby was calm and relaxed but, as my colleague pointed out, it’s possible that the children are genetically calm. Would the same methods work out for many of the very high maintenance babies we see?
Amongst those that participated in the discussion, Alison, the mother of a 6-weeks-old baby, has abandoned attempting to stick to a strict routine. Her baby had been very unsettled from the start. “I don’t think being too uptight about routines is good for either you or the baby”, she said, “We’ve settled into some routine at night but not yet during the day”. Elizabeth, mother of two, said that she found it easier “to just go with the flow. Gradually you learn what each cry means and you respond to that. Once you can do this it makes life much easier”. Two of the mothers were completely convinced by Gina Ford’s routines. Nikki, a single parent, said that she found it “ a god-send”. She confessed that she’s never been a routine type of person but found it was exactly what suited their lifestyle. Clare, on the other hand, admitted that she was a routine “freak” and after struggling for several weeks without any kind of structure she bought the book and followed it. Her 8-weeks-old baby sleeps throughout the night. Everyone who was using Ford’s routines admitted that they picked out the instructions that suited them rather than slavishly following her “minute by minute” plan, which even tells mothers what and when they should eat.
The evidence arising from the discussion of routine is that most mothers strive for some form of routine but that they are willing to forego strict rules in the interest of responding to their own particular baby’s needs. Ford’s book appears to be have proven most helpful to those who picked out the parts that fitted into their own and their baby’s needs.
The first few weeks at home with a new baby are the time when you get to know each other and when breast feeding is established. By following the tips (not “rules”) below parents will find that routine will gradually emerge. Remember that every baby is different and that some babies respond much more quickly to a routine and different tips work better for different babies. Also, circumstances vary and it may be necessary to adapt a routine around work schedules or restricted living space. Sleeping from 7 until 7 certainly doesn’t fit in with many Hong Kong working parents. Finally, don’t be tied down by routines. As one m other said to me, “There’s nothing nicer than breast feeding your baby in the afternoon to wake up an hour later with her fast asleep and still on your breast”.
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